alta alatis patent

if a guy stares at ur boobs 

just stare at his dick

maybe squint a little bit

Plot Twist: Stark Industries buys Tumblr. We all get free issue laptops with fantastic WiFi.

wolfcifer:

You’re walking in the woods
There’s no one around and your phone is dead
Out of the corner of your eye you spot him:

gay opera dubstep vampire

owlcitymordred:

I don’t think the BBC were hugged enough as children.

doomscritters:

are you shitting me

discopeanut:

- Helen Mirren, beautiful in every way it’s possible for a human to be beautiful. 

discopeanut:

- Helen Mirren, beautiful in every way it’s possible for a human to be beautiful. 

shh-im-in-my-mindpalace:

thatpsychowriter:

thetenthdoctah:

ophilinonoo:

dude can you imagine before the fall like two office angels hanging around the water cooler in the break room. “so what’s on your list of things to do toda- hurufhjgghh”

I SHOULDNT BE LAUGHING

In which every angel yells, “DADDAMNIT CAS, NOT AGAAAAAAAAAAAAAIN—”

DADDAMNIT.